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The Kingdom of You
by Lyn Allen
Once upon a time, there was a magical kingdom. It was a place of wonder and beauty. Birds sang, and laughter and music floated on the air. Flowers nodded in joyful welcome. Everything lying within the borders shone with loving care and existed in harmony.
Borders stood strong and clearly defined, yet not threatening. Well-tended roads led in and out of the kingdom. Each gateway had an overseer to monitor traffic. While strong and obvious like the perimeters, the overseers also acted as greeters and extended warm welcomes to invited guests. Brightly colored signs communicated the culture and guidelines for visitors in ways that were clear, direct and honoring of all.
People who saw this kingdom felt the beauty of this place so deeply, it gave them joy. Those invited to enter found wisdom and peace there.
Nearby, a neighboring kingdom presented a marked contrast. Entrances and buildings were deserted and in disrepair. While visitors could enter and leave at will, a general air of neglect made many turn around at the gates. Those who went in often did not stay long.
A third kingdom in the region featured tall, thick walls of stone topped with spikes and razor wire. Heavily armed guards were stationed at each gate and along the top of the walls. The few who entered did so under threat. Most stayed away. Some were taken captive and held hostage.
Nearby, a neighboring kingdom presented a marked contrast. Entrances and buildings were deserted and in disrepair. While visitors could enter and leave at will, a general air of neglect made many turn around at the gates. Those who went in often did not stay long.
While very different, the three kingdoms shared these features: They all had borders and gateways. Each kingdom had the potential to be a barriered fortress, a welcoming sanctuary or an independent stronghold. And all three kingdoms required care and maintenance in order to thrive.
Consider the kingdom as a metaphor for you and your life. If you see yourself as a kingdom, what do you notice? Do you resemble one of the kingdoms above?
Do people trample in and out of your borders without permission or respect? Do you allow invaders to pillage your kingdom? Or do people only rarely dare to approach for fear they’ll be held prisoner?
If your borders are not clearly defined and lovingly maintained, you may find your personal space is a haven for refugees from their own kingdoms. On the other hand, when your borders are thick walls with armed guards, you may end up feeling isolated and lonely because in truth, you are not available to connect with others.
Take a moment to go inside and feel yourself deeply. See the Kingdom of You in your mind’s eye. What do you see?
Free lunch!
Thar be dragons here! Be very afraid.
Go away and leave me alone.
There’s nobody home.
You are welcome when I invite you in. Visiting hours are……
Are your guidelines for admittance clearly stated, first for yourself and then for visitors?
As you tour your kingdom, notice the level of care displayed. Is everything working the way you want it to? Is anything in need of repair, maintenance or even removal? Are you currently undergoing remodeling or expansion?
Imagine you are standing on a hillside overlooking The Kingdom of You. As you observe your kingdom, do you like what you see and feel?
The next time you feel lonely, invaded, disrespected or dishonored by someone else, observe your kingdom to see what it might be saying to the world. Then check in with your heart to see what changes you choose in the Kingdom of You.
Copyright 2006, Lyn Allen. All rights reserved. No portion of this article may be reproduced in any way without specific prior written permission by the author.
Grace-Lyn Allen is a Master Certified Coach and Professional Mentor Coach with 13 years’ experience in the coaching profession. She draws on her corporate background, experience as a counselor and her spiritual perspective to support individuals and work teams who choose to have life on their own terms.
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