Articles

Back to Articles Page What is Coaching - Really? by Lyn Allen The term "coach" has become hot in today's business market. More and more people call themselves coaches, many of whom have little or no training or credentialing. As a result, consumers may get mixed messages about what coaching is and isn't. The definition of "coaching" seems to be a moving target! Because coaching as a profession is now in its adolescence, we see some of the typical confusion of adolescence. Consider the sheer numbers of people calling themselves coaches compared to the number of credentialed coaches in the marketplace: An estimated 15,000 - 20,000 professionals worldwide now refer to themselves as coaches or say they offer some sort of "coaching" services. As of January, 2005, the International Coach Federation (ICF), coaching's primary professional and credentialing association, reported membership of 7700 and fewer than 500 coaches credentialed at the Master Certified Coach level. Consultants, trainers and even self-help authors may now refer to themselves as coaches, even when they've had no training or certification as a professional coach. However, training alone does not resolve confusion about what coaching is. Based on results reflected in the ICF credentialing process, individuals may undergo expensive and rigorous training, and still not have a clear understanding of coaching, especially as distinct from consulting or therapy. For consumers who desire to be aware in the process of choosing a coach, and for new coaches who may not yet have clarity on what coaching is: Coaching IS a dynamic that occurs in present moment between two people, when there is clear agreement that one will support the other's development via self exploration, discovery, insights, shifts in perspective, and empowerment. Coaching is NOT telling someone else what to do, how they should feel, who they should be. A coach IS a catalyst for a change, growth, shifts, personal expansion/development. A coach is NOT your mother, father, best friend, babysitter, therapist, conscience, Boss of Your Life, the ultimate authority on your well-being. A coach DOES provide feedback, question to support your self exploration, celebrate your movement, challenge your self awareness, encourage your self responsibility, and support your self empowerment. A coach does NOT tell you what to do, control you or in any way violate your free will, explore why your mother yelled at you when you were a child, get into victimhood/co-dependency/co-addiction with you, give you the answers to the questions of your life, or in any way assume responsibility for your choices. A coach MODELS compassionate detachment, genuine and loving curiosity, maturity and lightness, discernment and gracefulness, and masterful and insightful communication skills including gracious and direct truth-speaking. Consultant/Therapist/Coach Comparison: Problems: A consultant will give you answers, attempt to solve problems for you and may tell you what to do. A therapist may ask you why you feel you have the problems in the first place. A coach will ask you what options you see for resolving problems and may explore those options with you. Feelings: A consultant will most likely not be interested in your feelings. A therapist may discuss, explore and analyze your feelings. A coach may ask you how you feel about something as a way to support you in being present with yourself so that you can make choices that will serve you best. Action/planning/strategy: A consultant may provide you with a plan and a strategy, and may provide services or staff to handle specific actions for you. A therapist may ask that you take specific steps or actions as a part of your healing and growth. A coach who is focused on your self empowerment will co-create your actions/plans/strategies with you, as opposed to prescribing or directing. Empowerment: A consultant may support your empowerment by removing external obstacles to your success and, when focused on behavior, may offer pattern replacement as a path to change. A therapist can support your empowerment through facilitating healing of past traumas and issues to create safety in moving ahead with one's life. A masterful coach, one who is empowered themselves and who keeps ego out of the coaching, can assist you in strengthening your self empowerment by reminding you of your strengths, encouraging you as you move into unfamiliar areas, and celebrating your creations with you. True coaching will seek to foster and nurture sustainable change from within rather than focusing on the symptoms of behavior with pattern replacement. Respect and Compassion: A consultant respects knowledge, information, answers, systems, and structures. With the consultant, focus is on the outcome. The consultant doesn't have to like the client in order to provide value. Compassion is not necessary, nor is gracefulness or graciousness. Some consultants do quite well using the forcefulness of their personalities, however that does not guarantee that change will be sustained when their engagement ends. A therapist respects the process, confidentiality, and the courage of someone who is willing to face themselves, their past, and their fears. It helps if a therapist likes the patient, however therapeutic effect can still occur without this as long as compassion and respect are present. Compassion for the humanity of the patient is essential. A coach must respect and have compassion for their client in order for coaching to take place. As in therapy, the intimacy that fosters safety, self discovery and the exploration of new possibilities requires a foundation of respect and compassion. Listening: A consultant tends to hear from their heads, as that is where we live when we are problem solving and giving answers. Consultants may use a label or category, such as a Type A or B personality. While this can in the short term provide a useful context or framework for people to use in problem solving, it does objectify or pigeonhole people and is ultimately limiting of personal awareness and development. Depending upon the therapist, their training and their own self awareness, a therapist may hear you from either head or heart, or even their own history of woundedness/victimhood that led them into therapy in the first place. Because of the nature of the game, a therapist may need to listen from the perspective of finding the appropriate diagnosis or label for you (a.k.a. find the right box to fit you in). A gifted, aware therapist who has done his or her own inner work, may listen to the voice of your heart and assist you to hear it as well. Like a therapist, a coach may hear you from head, heart, or their own victimhood, depending upon their level of self awareness and personal development. A coach who still has a need to label others can also have a need to listen from that perspective. And, like the therapist, a gifted, aware coach may also be able to hear the voice of your heart, and assist you in accessing that for yourself. A masterful coach will listen beyond the words and details for underlying "threads" and patterns, for unspoken truths, and for strengths as well as opportunities for growth. Coaching and Change: People often employ an externalized focus in working to bring about change. Generally, the result is little more than temporary symptom management brought about by the Band-AidT of pattern replacement. A masterful coach understands that lasting change requires more than an overlay or veneer of new information and new skills. In other words, giving people new information and skills without creating an internal foundation from which to use those new tools, is like slapping a coat of fresh paint on a building with a cracked foundation. Coaching works with people to re-engineer their own internal structural integrity. Coaching, at its best, can be profoundly transformational. Lives can and do change. As people develop and expand internally, they have increased capacity to contribute to change in the organizations in which we work and live. As we deepen our capacity to love ourselves and each other, we move exponentially beyond old limits and realities. As has been said, coaching does have the potential to transform the world, one person at a time. The answer to the question, "What is coaching, really?" is easily blurred from the sheer numbers of voices now making up the chorus of coaching. One basic distinction is this: If you are telling someone what to do, you are not coaching. If someone is telling you what to do, they are not coaching you. If, on the other hand, you are fully present in the moment for someone else at their request to hear the heart's voice, to champion new behaviors and insights, to evoke personal exploration grounded with co-designed actions, with respect and compassion for the "coachee" through the entire process, then odds are you are not only coaching, you are doing so masterfully. Lyn Allen is a Master Certified Coach and certified Professional Mentor Coach, in private practice as a coach since 1993. As a former HR professional and corporate manager, she knows the challenges of balancing budgets and deadlines with staff development needs. As a trainer and mentor to coaches worldwide and an assessor in the professional credentialing process, she offers a seasoned perspective on coaching. Lyn provides coaching and coach training to progressive corporate leaders and teams who choose to foster a collaborative management approach by redefining leadership. Copyright 2005, G. L. Allen. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any way without specific, prior written permission from the author.   Back to Articles Page